[ The New Rachel ]
*** Monday ***
The first day of school, Kitty put her plans in motion. She had secured her position as a prominent member of the Cheerios, but there were two other popular groups at the school: the Titan football team and the glee club. She was determined to make sure she was one of the most popular girls in school by making sure that members of both groups were members of her crew. Because she was a hot cheerleader this was a simple matter.
First she approached two of the most prominent members of the football team: Phillip “Phil” Lipoff an African American, and Robert “Bobby” “Boom Boom” Surette to be members of her lunch crew which also consisted of several Cheerios.
Next up was the Glee Club. Normally there was no way that cheerleaders and a glee club would unite, given the vast differences in the makeups of the groups, but in this case both were national champions in their respective activities, which gave them certain bragging rights!
She’d begun surveilling the glee club members the previous spring and over the summer to determine who were the best ones to approach were. They did not seem to have an actual leader anymore now that Quinn, that annoying Rachel Berry, former quarterback Finn Hudson, and the other seniors had graduated. Normally she would approach Brittany because she was on the Cheerios with her, but she was dumb as sand, and she was afraid that the message would not get through to the others as intended.
The Asian girl and the handsome gay guy both acted like they were in charge, but as she watched the group interact, there was one person she noticed they all seemed to respect: the guy in the wheelchair. An unlikely choice, given that he was probably only allowed in the group because of equal opportunity rules (how could he even dance? Weren’t they afraid he would run over their feet on stage?), but clearly the best one. Some quick research for an article about their nationals win and she found out his name was Artie Abrams.
She made her move after she saw him at his locker after second period. “Hello, Artie,” she introduced herself, “I don’t know if we’ve ever met, but I’m-”
“-Kitty Wilde, a sophomore, one of the new cheerleaders, and one of Coach Sue’s favorites,” he finished for her. “And, no, we’ve never met, but I’ve obviously heard of you and seen you around.”
She was taken aback by his assertiveness. Maybe he wasn’t as much of a pushover as she expected him to be? Maybe it would be easier to overlook the chair then she thought?
“Well I’m glad we are correcting that oversight,” she responded without missing a best. “I was thinking that the popular people should stick together, and wanted to extend an invitation to you and the other glee club members to eat lunch with my crew and I from now on. We’re both national champions and winners should stick together.”
“That would be awesome, yo!” He told her. “I couldn’t agree more.”
She smiled and told him, “Good, then I’ll see you there.” And with that she turned and walked off.
Mission accomplished.
# # #
Artie sat there for a moment, considering what had just happened. One of the most beautiful women in the school had just come up and talked to him, and not to ask directions or something mundane. She had known exactly who he was and chose to talk to him of her own volition, and she actually wanted to spend MORE time with him.
Just then Tina and Sam approached.
“What was that about?” Tina wanted to know.
“We’ve been invited to eat lunch with the popular group.” He told her.
They all smiled.
This National Championship thing was really beginning to pay off.
# # #
Later that morning, Kitty was standing outside Coach Sue’s office just as she was introducing a McKinley alum to her infant daughter Robin, who was cooing in her arms.
“Porcelain this is my daughter Robin. I’ve loved the name ever since I was a little girl. It recalls hope and springtime…and my favorite dead Bee Gee.” The baby continued to cool in her arms. “Oh, she’s the love of my life. And I’m so devoted to her,” Sue said in baby talk. She kissed her daughter on the forehead and put you down in her stroller.
“Kitty get in here!” Sue Hollered.
Without missing a beat, Kitty marched into the room and said, “Yes, the Coach Sylvester.”
“I needed you to change Robin’s diaper and then sing her a lullaby.” She then looked down at her daughter, “preferably something not yet butchered by the glee club. Good luck finding one,” she added, looking up the Kitty.
Sue stood up straight and said, “Porcelain this is Kitty. Kitty is my new head bitch.” She walked over to get the child. “She’s like a young Quinn Fabray, except she’s not pregnant, manic-depressive, or in and out of wheelchair.”
As she rolled the stroller out of the room Kitty turned and said, “Shouldn’t you be in college or something? I thought gay people were all successful overachievers.”
She then continued out of the office.
“I am successful,” Porcelain answered her.
“Oh don’t pay any attention what Kitty thinks,” Sue chided him, “even if it’s exactly what the rest of the world thinks.
“I’m actually very proud of you, Twinkletush. You are real trailblazer.” She walked around behind her desk and sat down. “You know, it used to be just straight ex-football players would lurk the halls of high school after graduation. But you’ve proven that gay ex-show choir champs can also be depressive sad sacks desperately clinging to the past.”
“I’m not a sadsack okay? My classes at Allen County Community College start next week-” he responded.
“-I’m sorry. I tuned out the moment you opened your mouth. Keep livin’ the dream Porcelain.”
From her position outside the office Kitty smiled. She was really beginning to like Coach Sylvester.
# # #
That day Artie, Tina, and the others entered the cafeteria and picked up their lunch trays.
From the corner of his eye, Artie saw Kitty and some of the other cheerleaders and jocks sitting at the popular table. True to her word, Kitty waved at them to come join her group when she saw them.
Once everyone had a tray, they made their way over to the table Kitty and the others were at. It was the same table Quinn, Finn, Puck, and Mike used to sit at when they were considered popular.
“Hi, Artie,” Kitty said with a smile, “glad you made it.”
“Wouldn’t miss it for the world, Kitty,” he told her.
To the others she said, “Hello and welcome to our crew, these are my friends Bobby, Phil, Suzanne, and Celeste.”
Each of them greeted them with a “Hey” or “Hi”
Artie introduce the New Directions members on turn, “This is Tina, Blaine, Sam, Sugar, and Joe. And I think you all know Brittany.”
They all greeted each other and sat down.
“So Artie,” Kitty said, “now that so many of your group has graduated, what do you think your chances are of winning nationals again?”
“We still have a lot of good singers in the group, and we’ll be having auditions this Friday to recruit some new members. We’ve had a lot of interest in joining since last spring. Hopefully we will have enough good candidates that we will be able to pick and choose the best of the best.”
“Do you really think you’ll get that many people wanting to join your dweeb club, ” Phil asked.
Kitty shot him a dirty look.
Artie ignored the rude comment and simply said, “we’re not anticipating any problems.”
Blaine and Tina looked at each other with looks of concern.
# # #
In the hallway at William McKinley High, Jacob Ben-Israel walked down the hallway with his microphone and camera updating his video blog for the new year.
“What’s up blogosphere? Jacob Ben-Israel here back on the street with an exclusive look at McKinley’s newest celebrities the New Directions.”
He walked up to Artie who was by his locker and said, “Artie Abrams lunchroom sources tell me you’ve been seen sitting with Cheerios.”
“Well I’m usually seen sitting,” Artie said with a grin. “But yes; and can I tell you it’s great finally being popular. National champs baby! Whoo!” he said to the camera, giving a passer-by a high-five.
Jacob walked over to Sam who is surrounded by girls getting his autograph.
“Sam Evans – from hobo stripper to Glee Club celebrity. How does it feel?”
“Awesome, and about time,” Sam answered
He then approached Tina Cohen-Chang who said, “I never thought I would have a freshman for a personal assistant.”
The camera panned to show Dottie Kazatori offering Tina a banana. She took it scoffing and said, “This isn’t organic,” and threw on the ground.
“Wow. See you next Tina,” Jacob said.
Over by Sam a girl said, “Do Taylor Lautner again,” excitedly.
He then did an imitation of Taylor Lautner from Twilight movies, “Bella, I love you and I’m a werewolf.”
The Girls squealed.
Jacob placed his hand over Tina’s shoulder and asked, “Is it true you broke up with Mike Chang a week after tattooing Mike Chang 4ever on your hip because the long-distance thing was too hard?”
She moved out of his grasp and said, “Um, yeah. I still love him and we’re still friends, and I changed the tattoo to ‘make change 4ever.’ Change is good.”
In the choir room he approached Blaine, Brittany, Artie, and Tina all standing off to the side looking at the nationals trophy and some pictures.
“Face it. Rachel Berry was the group’s undisputed star. So really the only question is – which one of you is the new Rachel? Well?
All smiled and said, “I am.”
Artie got the ‘oh, no’ look.
# # #
“Glee!,” Mr. Schue said with joy as he entered the choir room for the first Glee Club rehearsal of the year.
Artie, and the remaining members of the new directions Sam, Britney, Tina, Joe, Blaine, and Sugar all cheered.
“We are coming off of a national championship, but it’s time to look forward. And thanks to Glee now being the coolest club in the school-”
“-Whoop-!”
“-Hey-o!-”
“-this shouldn’t be a problem-”
“-Alright. Whoa. Whoa!-”
They enthusiastically applauded.
“Yes, we’ve lost some big voices. But we still have some huge ones in here. And I promised to do everything I can to replace the ones that we lost. And on that note I’d like to introduce you to our newest member -”
Blaine and Tina shared an uneasy look.
“- the M.V.P. Of last year’s nationals, Wade “Unique” Adams.”
The group cheered however, they were not very enthusiastic. Mr. Schue didn’t seem to noticed.
“That’s a great haircut Mercedes, I thought you graduated,” Brittney said. Artie looked up at her and gave her a ‘what she was talking about’ look.
“I wanted to be somewhere where different was celebrated,” Unique told them.
“We are so excited to have you,” Mr. Schue said.
There was more clapping this time, just from Joe and Sugar, the rest were even less enthusiastic than before.
This time Mr. Schue seem to notice. “Guy’s where’s the love?”
“I think Wade is great, but the competition to be the new Rachel is already so intense. The last thing we need is one more contender.”
“The new Rachel?” He asked, surprised.
“Every Glee Club needs a star performer,” Tina told him. “Rachel was that and now that she’s gone many of us want the job.”
“Okay,” Mr. Schu chided her, “We don’t win with stars. We win as a team; one that supports new members.”
They all looked back at him in surprise.
“Now, I don’t want to hear anymore of this ‘new Rachel’ stuff, okay? Have a seat, Wade.”
Wade sat down next to Blaine and said quietly, “Make no mistake, Unique will be the new Rachel.”
Brittany and Tina leaned in and Blaine said, “We decide this on our own then, ThunderDome style. 5:00 in the auditorium.”
# # #
That afternoon the four candidates for the new Rachel met with Artie in the auditorium.
“So,” Tina said, “here are the rules. We perform the song for Artie, and he makes his choice. We go to Mr. Schue as a group, and tell him who the new lead soloist it. Hopefully it’ll be me because that’s what Rachel wanted.”
“Although,” Artie said, “I am uncomfortable doing this behind Mr. Schue’s back, I am a director. Therefore, I never pass up on an opportunity to judge people.”
“What song are we singing?” Wade asked.
“What Rachel would sing if she were here,” Tina informed her. “The song of the summer, ‘Call Me, Maybe.”
“Yes,” Brittany said excitedly.
“Do you need time to prepare?” Tina asked.
“I can sing any song any time,” Wade informed her. “just press ‘play’ and get back.”
The music began to play and they began to sing the song made famous by Carly Rae Jepsen.
Unique:
I threw a wish in the well,
Don’t ask me, I’ll never tell
I looked to you as it fell,
And now you’re in my way.
Blaine:
I’d trade my soul for a wish,
Pennies and dimes for a kiss
I wasn’t looking for this,
But now you’re in my way.
Tina with Unique:
Your stare was holdin’,
Ripped jeans, skin was showin’
Hot night, wind was blowin’
Tina:
Where you think you’re going, baby?
Brittany:
Hey, I just met you
And this is crazy
But here’s my number
So call me, maybe?
Tina:
It’s hard to look right
At you baby
But here’s my number
So call me, maybe?
Unique with Blaine:
Hey! I just met you
And this is crazy
But here’s my number
So call me, maybe?
Brittany with Tina:
And all the other boys
Try to chase me
Blaine, Brittany, Tina, and Unique:
But here’s my number,
So call me, maybe?
Blaine with Brittany:
You took your time with the call
I took no time with the fall
You gave me nothing at all
But still, you’re in my way
I beg and borrow and steal
Had foresight and it’s real
I didn’t know I would feel it
But it’s in my way
Tina with Unique:
Your stare was holdin’,
Ripped jeans, skin was showin’
Hot night, wind was blowin’
Tina:
Where you think you’re going, baby?
Brittany (Unique):
Hey, I just met you (Ooh yeah!)
And this is crazy (Crazy!)
But here’s my number
So call me, maybe? (Call me, yeah!)
Tina:
It’s hard to look right
At you baby (Unique: Baby!)
But here’s my number
So call me, maybe?
Unique with Blaine:
Hey! I just met you
And this is crazy
But here’s my number
So call me, maybe?
Brittany with Tina:
And all the other boys
Try to chase me
Blaine, Brittany, Tina, and Unique:
But here’s my number
So call me, maybe?
Brittany with Blaine:
Before you came into my life
I missed you so bad
I missed you so bad
I missed you so, so bad
Unique with Tina:
Before you came into my life
I missed you so bad
And you should know that
I missed you so, so bad
Tina:
It’s hard to look right, (Blaine: Hard to look right)
At you baby, (Brittany: At you baby!)
But here’s my number, (Brittany: Yeah, yeah, yeah!)
Unique with Blaine and Tina:
So call me, maybe? (Unique: Yeah, yeah, yeah!)
Brittany:
Hey, I just met you
And this is crazy (Tina: Crazy!) (Blaine: Yeah)
But here’s my number (Tina: Maybe!)
So call me, maybe? (Blaine: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah)
Brittany with Tina:
(Unique: And all the other boys!) And all the other boys
(Unique: Try to chase me!) Try to chase me (Unique: Oh yeaah!) (Blaine: Try to chase me!)
But here’s my number
So call me, maybe? (Blaine: Call me!)
Brittany with Blaine:
Before you came into my life (Tina: Before you came into my life!) (Unique: Oh oh!)
I missed you so bad (Tina: I missed you so so bad!)
I missed you so bad (Tina: So bad!)
I missed you so, so bad (Unique: So bad!)
Unique with Tina:
Before you came into my life (Blaine: Before you!) (Brittany: Oh, yeah!)
I missed you so bad (Brittany: So bad!)
You should know that (Blaine and Brittany: Yeah!)
Blaine, Brittany, Tina, and Unique:
So call me maybe?
Throughout the performance Artie eyed them critically paying very close attention to each performer’s strengths and weaknesses.
When it was over, a breathless Blaine asked, “So, Artie, who’s the new Rachel?”
He eyed them, and told them that he needed some time to consider.
# # #
That day after school Kitty was at the Lima Bean with some friends, including Phil and Bobby from the football team, and Suzanne and Celeste from the Cheerios, when she noticed that “Porcelain” was working as a Barista. She thought that it was hilarious and decided that she needed to mess with him.
She glanced across the room and saw that he was socializing with some of his glee club friends who were there as customers. He had just sat down when she raised her hand and snapped her fingers and obnoxiously said, “Excuse me, garçon?”
He reluctantly turned away from his friends, stood and scampered over toward her.
“My iced latte’s too cold.” She told him matter-of-factly
“It’s an iced latte,” he said. Not seeing the problem.
“It’s an iced latte that’s too cold. I’m going to need you to make me a new one.”
Her friends chuckled.
“Hello?” One of the other customers said
“Hey! Kurt!” the manager at the desk said. “You have to refill the biscotti barrel every 15 minutes.” He open the lid showing that it was empty.
So his real name was Kurt, she noted.
“Coming,” Kurt said to his boss.
Kurt turned his head and watched as the club members got up and left, gesturing that they would call him later.
“-and I’ll be right back with your latte,” he said to Kitty.
Kitty smiled her evil grin, and her friends did the same and laughed.
*** Tuesday ***
Artie sat with the usual group the next day in the cafeteria. The others were beginning to lose patience will him and wanted to know his choice was.
“You had enough time,” Tina said. “So who is it?”
“You can’t rush the casting process. My genius needs it’s dreamtime.”
Just then a tall thin brunette walked by and stopped.
“You guys are the Glee Club right?” she asked. “Hi. I’m going to try out. I’m a sophomore my name is Marley. ”
Tina turned and gave her a big fake smile and said, “Great. Well, lots of competition, so good luck to you.”
Marley smiled and walked away, and Sam turned his head and checked out her ass.
Then Wade, in full make up, came over and join them and said, “Unique offers her greetings and salutations.”
“You can’t wear that make up stuff in here,” Sam told her. “You have to know how this stuff works. It’s like Game of Thrones.”
“Yeah,” Artie added, “the peace between us and the truly popular kids is weak. Winter is coming. It’s not going to take much for us to get smacked down to the bottom again.”
“Maybe you should just save ‘Unique’ for performances?” Blane suggestion, “and be Wade the rest of the time.”
“A-All right, ” Wade relented, clearly disappointed. “I’ll go take off my face.”
He rose and left.
# # #
Kitty watched from a few yards away as the freak known as Unique approached the other glee club members sitting at the popular table. This could be trouble. No matter how popular the glee club had become, there was no way that school population would accept a transexual as part of the cool group. She was just thinking that she was going to have to say something to Artie, when he, Blaine and Joe discouraged him from wearing makeup in public. From Artie’s statement she could tell that he understood what was at stake. He was clearly more perceptive than she’d initially thought.
Her thoughts were interrupted when Phil and Bobby appeared at her side. Hopefully they hasn’t seen Unique the freak.
# # #
Unique had just left the room when Artie noticed Kitty, Phil, and Bobby, approach. They walked up and sat in the spot vacated by Unique.
“Hey, Glee people,” she said
“Hey, Kitty,” Artie greeted her.
“Hey,” Phil said, “have you guys seen the new lunch lady?”
Blaine looked over his shoulders and saw an overweight lunchroom lady cleaning a condiments cart.
“She’s so fat they took pictures of her last Christmas. Still printing.”
“Hey, she has to wear a watch on both wrists because she covers two time zones,” Bobbie added.
They laughed making Arrie and several of the others very uncomfortable, and he looked down at this tray.
“Well maybe she has like a medical condition Britney suggested. Or she swallowed somebody with a medical condition.”
Phil, Bobby, and Kitty all laughed at that is if it was meant as a joke.
“Right, Artie,”? Bobbie asked..
Everyone looked at Artie who glanced up and sat there for a moment like a deer in headlights. The popular kids expecting him to join that fun. The glee members uneasily awaiting what he might say. He glanced at the lunch lady and then back at the group. Kitty met his gaze as if to say, “come on.”
After another awkward moment he put on a fake smile and said, “When she sits around the house she really sits around the house.”
Everybody laughed. Kitty smiled, Bobby said, “Attaboy!” The other kids cheered him on.
Inside Artie didn’t feel so good about himself.
*** Wednesday ***
Phil approached Kitty before lunch.
“I don’t understand why you’ve invited those glee club freaks to have lunch with us. The guys have already started talking about that Unique person. It freaks us all out to see that in the locker room. Everyone’s convinced it’s gay and checking us out.” He told her.
“Wade/Unique joined their group after I extended the invitation to the glee club. But he’s already become a source of conflict among them. Trust me, Unique will part ways with the Glee club. I give it a week at most,” she reassured him.
“It better, or I’ll be forced to take matters into my own hands,” he told her.
She suddenly turned and got very forceful, “You will follow MY lead on this, and do nothing unless I specifically tell you too, unless you want to find yourself on the outside as well.”
He stormed off.
She took a deep breath.
As she entered the cafeteria, she grabbed her tray of food and walked over to their usual table.
“Hi, Artie,” she greeted him, trying to put the confrontation out of her head,
“Hi, Kitty,” he responded sweetly.
*** Thursday ***
Thursday after school, Kitty came home and was greeted by her parents.
“How was school, sweetie?” Her mom wanted to know.
“Good,” Kitty answered, “so far my plans are going as we expected. I’ve got members of all of the popular groups in my lunch crew.”
“Oh?”
“Yes,” Kitty told her, “the Cheerios, the Titan football players, and the New Directions,”
She nodded approvingly at the first two and then asked, “New directions?”
“Oh,” Kitty explained, “they’re the school singing group-”
“-You mean the Glee Club?” Her dad asked, joining the conversation. “Oh,Kitty, you should know better than that.”
“The New Directions are National Champions like the Cheerios, and extremely popular at school,” she defended her decision to have them in her crew.
“National Champion losses are still losers,” he told her, “and that kind of popularity is never permanent.”
Her mom put her hand on her daughter’s shoulder, “We’re just worried about you sweetie, remember what happened at your other school?”
Kitty got rigid for a moment. “That is something I will never forget,” she told them. How could she?
“Glee Club is by definition a loser club,” her dad cautioned her. “We strongly recommend you avoid any strategy that includes them.”
He walked out of the room.
“We’re just looking out for your best interest,” her mom reassured her. “Just think about it,” she suggested on her way out of the room leaving Kitty alone with her thoughts.
She rolled her eyes and went into her room to do her homework and think.
*** Friday ***
Friday at lunch, Porcelain was sitting with that other glee club members. Kitty noticed that most of them were in a particularly good mood and asked about it.
“Glee Club auditions are this afternoon,” Porcelain answered her matter-of-factly, “hopefully we will manage to find some powerhouses to replaced the ones we’ve lost, so we can win nationals again this year.”
“Didn’t you already graduate?” She asked him, “why are you even still here?”
Kurt opened his mouth and was a about to say something snarky in response when Artie interrupted. “You should try out Kitty?”
Our of the corner of her eye, she could see that Phil and Bobby thought the idea was hilarious.
“I bet you’re a great singer,” he finished.
But Kitty wasn’t going to give the football players the satisfaction of seeing her react.
“That’s not exactly my style,” she told him with a fake smile.
Truth be told she was an amazing singer, but she wouldn’t be caught dead in glee club weather her parents objected or not.
# # #
Friday afternoon in the auditorium, Artie, Mr. Schue, the other existing glee club members, and Kurt gathered for glee club auditions.
“Okay, let’s get started,” Mr. Schue said.
Kurt turned on a camcorder.
“And remember,” Kurt said, “were looking for superstars.”
First up was Stoner Brett who rapped. Then De’Wanda Umber just danced to a techno song with no words at all. Them there were numerous other candidates each worse than the one before. They all watched in horror.
Next up was a half black half white guy with one name.
“Hello! sir.” Mr. Schou said “What’s your name? ”
“Jake,” he answered.
“Got a last name Jake?”
“Uh, just Jake.”
“Okay. Um, well, show us what you’ve got, Just Jake.” Will Said with a smile.
He launched into a beautifully performed rendition of “Never Say Never” by The Fray.
Some things we don’t talk about
Rather do without
And just hold the smile
Falling in and out of love
Ashamed and proud of
Together all the while
You can never say never
While we don’t know when
But time and time again
Younger now than we were before
Don’t let me go
Don’t let me go
Don’t let me go
Don’t let me go
Don’t let me go
Don’t let me go
Sugar thought he was sexy. Sam disagreed, but Unique agreed with Sugar. Everyone could see that he was talented.
It looked like they had their first new member until they saw how he reacted when Mr. Schue cut him off halfway through the song.
“Okay, Jake, thank you.”
The music stopped abruptly.
“Don’t I get to finish?” Jake asked with surprise.
“We got a lot of people to see,” Mr. Schue told him.
“I’ve been practicing.”
“We’ve seen enough, thank you.”
He walked over to one of the musicians and forcibly knocked over her music stand in anger.
“That’s rude and unacceptable,” Kurt said
Artie liked his passion, but it was clearly misdirected.
“I’ll handle this,” Mr. Schue said raising to his feet saying, “Jake, come on man. Why don’t you pick up the music stand?”
Jake’s scoffed and walked off stage.
Mr. Schue sat down and Kurt hollered, “next.”
Next up was the brunette that they had met at lunch earlier that week.
“Okay, my name is Marley Rose, and I’ll be singing New York State of Mind Billy Joel.
Some folks like to get away
For a holiday from the neighborhood
Hop a flight to Miami Beach
Or to Hollywood, ooh ooh
But I’m taking a Greyhound
On the Hudson River Line
I’m in a New York state of mind
Ooh, It was so easy living day by day
Out of touch with the rhythm and the blues
But now I need a little give and take
The New York Times,
The Daily News
Oh, It comes down to reality
And it’s fine with me
’cause I’ve let it slide
Don’t care if it’s Chinatown or on Riverside, ooh ooh
I don’t have any reasons
I’ve left them all behind
I’m in a New York state of
Mind!
Oh!
I’m just taking a Greyhound
On the Hudson River Line
‘Cause I’m in
I’m in a New York
state of Mind
Ooh
Oh
New York
State
Of mind
The song was performed amazingly. Her performance was filled with passion and soul and beauty.
When it was over she got around of applause.
“Thank you. Thank You,” Mr. Schou said.
Artie applauded loudly and had a big smile on his face. Maybe they would find some new members after all?
To the group Mr. Schue chuckled and said, “Wow. That’s what I call star quality. What do you guys think?”
“Ten,” Sugar said.
“She’s good. She’s good,” Blaine answered uneasily.
Unique and Tina looked at each other uneasily.
*** Monday ***
Monday morning Mr. Schue posted the results of the auditions:
NEW DIRECTIONS
2012-2013
Artie Abrams
Wade “Unique” Adams
Blaine Anderson
Tina Cohen-Chang
Sam Evans
Joe Hart
Sugar Motta
Brittany S. Pierce
Marley Rose
Of 23 auditions only one new member was added.
# # #
Blaine and Tina walked into the choir room as Kurt was organizing sheet music on the floor.
“Um, what’s this?” Blaine asked.
“Organizing all the sheet music,” he answered matter-of-factly.
At the same time, Artie rolled in from the other door and stopped just short of where the music was laid out.
“Artie, go around it, not over it,” Kurt told him bluntly.
Artie gave him a glare and turned to go around.
Just then Dottie arrived and handed Tina a dessert.
“Thanks Dottie,” she told her, “you’re dismissed for the day.”
Tina turned and handed it to Artie. “This is for you. And no it’s not a bribe because we all know Rachel told me herself I’m the new Rachel.”
Artie lowered his head. He had stalled as long as he could, and wasn’t looking forward to this conversation. He was interrupted mid thought by Unique’s entrance. Maybe if Mr.Schue arrived soon enough, he could stall some more.
“MVP in the house,” Unique said entering the room wearing a blouse, skirt, nylons, and makeup.
“Bro,” Joe told him, “I thought we agreed you’d only wear that stuff onstage-”
“What’s wrong with you guys?” Kurt asked. “This club is about diversity and acceptance. Or at least used to be. And another thing, since when did everyone become so obsessed about who’s the biggest star?”
“Since Day One,” Tina said. “You and Rachel fought over solos for three years.”
She turned to Artie putting him back on the hot seat. “No more stalling already; who’s the new Rachel?”
“Yeah, who is it?” Sugar wanted to know.
“Tell us,” Brittany said.
The candidates all gathered around him like a pack of vultures surrounding him.
Artie glanced at the door, still no Mr. Schue. He took a deep breath.
“After meticulous deliberation, and an online poll…. ” he rolled out of the center of the group.
“The new Rachel is…Blaine. -”
“-How?” Tina demanded.
“Brittany, you were a close second.”
“-I came in third?-” Tina asked in disbelief
“-let’s not worry about third and fourth place.” He told her.
“And we don’t need to talk about this either,” she said taking the delicious looking dessert out of his hand. He signed.
Unique leaned over and asked, “Why do you hate strong Black women for?”
“I don’t” he answered softly
The commotion was interrupted when Mr. Schue walked into the room leading Marley.
“Guys, this young lady gave hands-down one of the best auditions I have ever seen. Let’s give it up for our newest member Marley Rose.”
Everyone applauded and cheered enthusiastically except Tina and Unique who stood there sulking.
“Marley,” Blaine said, awkwardly assuming the mantle of leadership, “on behalf of all the New Directions, um…welcome.”
“Thank you,” she said. “I’m really excited to be here.”
“I really like your sweater, where did you get it?” Sugar asked.
“Oh thanks,” she answered then looked down at her top, “Um, J.Crew”
Sugar look at her, surprised, clearly knowing better, “Really?
# # #
After glee rehearsal, Tina cornered Artir by his locker. “I didn’t even make runner up?”
“Tina, it’s not personal.”
“We’ve been friends since we were little, I thought I knew you-”
“-If you really knew me, you’d know that I take my craft very seriously. And if you’re my friend, you’ll respect me for it.”
Tina pouted.
Artie was about to say something comforting so she would stop and think, and he could escape, when Kitty saved him from it.
“Are you ready to go?” Kitty said to him as she approached.
“Really, Artie,” Tina said to him. “Now you’re hanging out with her after school too?” She scoffed and stormed off.
“What’s HER problem?” Kitty asked.
“She’s just mad because she’s not the New Rachel.” Artie told her matter-of-factly. “Shall we go?”
“The new what?”
“Long story.”
# # #
Kitty and Artie sat side by side in the audio visual room so he could show her the video of their nationals win.
“So, unfortunately I didn’t film the raw footage of this, but I did edit this together.” He told her, and went on to explain the camera shots used, along with the split screen, superimposed text, and other editing effects he’d utilized to make the footage interesting.
She could see how passionate he was about it, and how much thought and work he had put into the edits and transitions by the way he explained it. He was clearly talented.
As she began to watch that video she was drawn into it as she watched the performances of Edge of Glory (Lady Gaga), It’s All Coming Back To Me (Celine Dion), and Paradise By The Dashboard Light (Meatloaf). She could see how much the New Directions had enjoyed performing their numbers, and the care they had apparently taken to make sure Artie was fully integrated into the performance. He was never just there as she’d always assumed. He always had a dance partner or had a special part just for him. Although she would never say so publicly, the group sounded awesome, and she was surprised by how strong a singer Artie was.
As that performance finished, she turned toward him and said, “Think you for sharing this with me.”
“No problem,” he beamed.
*** Tuesday ***
Tuesday at lunch, the New Directions and Cheerios were eating lunch together again. Artie quietly ate his lunch while his friends talked, trying to stay under the radar.
“Brittany, I’m sorry, but I won fair and square.” Blaine told her. “You can’t just decide not to sing anymore. We all need your voice.”
“I had a song in my heart Blaine Warbler, and you killed it. Now I have a dead song in my heart. Pretty soon the corpse of my dead heart song is going to start to smell.”
Kitty who was listening to this couldn’t stand it anymore and decided to change the subject.
“Okay, guys, since we can’t do a popularity homecoming float with all white people I say we should do one with all-white chrysanthemums.”
“That’s a good idea,” Brittney said.
This comment made Tina and Artie who weren’t talking to each other uncomfortable and they shared a look.
“If we need a float why don’t we just all ride her,” Phil suggested, gesturing to the overweight lunch lady. Clearly he wanted to distract from the fact that he was a member of her group and black. The warning Kitty had given him the other day ringing in his head.
“Look at her boobs,” Sugar said, “it’s like two grocery bags full of soup.”
All of the popular students laughed
“That’s really mean!” Marley chided her.
“Excuse me?” Kitty asked, still laughing.
“You don’t know her. You don’t know what her life is like.”
“So? Why do you care?” Kitty wanted to know.
“Because she’s my mom,” Marley answered.
Kitty’s expression showed disbelief, and suddenly the glee club members became very uncomfortable.
“I thought you guys were different,” Marley said as she rose and left the group.
Glee club members continue to sit there uncomfortably through the rest of lunch.
# # #
After lunch Kitty was engrossed in her thoughts about the most recent development when Phil approached her. “See, I told you it was a mistake to let them into our group.” He chided her.
“Don’t you mean my group?” She asked condescendingly.
“Hey, the football team is just as cool as the Cheerios.”
“Really?” She told him. “Which one of us has a track record of national championships going back years? That would be us. Which of us is on ESPN every year? That would also be us too. Who has a hard time even winning more games than they lose in a season, and hasn’t even been to state in over 10 years? Oh that’s right, that would be you. The football team is cool only because we allow them to be.
“Now, I will handle the glee club, and I will let you know when your input is welcome or requested.”
Kitty really didn’t want to sever ties with the glee club, but had to admit to herself that she was concerned about the most recent developments. She could not allow that defiance, and this Unique freak just wouldn’t fit in with her crew.
# # #
Later that afternoon Sam walked up to Marley at her locker.
“Hey, Marley. Um, I just wanted to apologize for all of us, and beg you not to quit.
“Look, I get you. Like, for instance, I know that that sweater is from Walmart and your mom sewed the J.Crew label into it.”
“How do you know that?” she wanted to know
“Because my mom used to do the same thing for me. The best thing about glee club is it’s not about labels. If you can sing, or if you can dance, you belong; and dude you can sing.”
“I don’t know,” she said, “you say that, but the way you were making fun of my mom, I- something doesn’t feel right,” she said closing her locker.
Suddenly the rest of the Glee Club were all together behind her.
“We came to apologize,” Artie said
“I think being popular felt a little too good,” Tina added, “and we forgot ourselves.”
“Well I didn’t. I was always popular,” Brittney said, “but I do forget to wear underwear sometimes.”
“The best part about Glee Club is it everyone gets to be a star,” Blaine said. “Which is why were all hoping that you could come and rehearse with us this afternoon and maybe sing lead vocal one of the songs were working on.”
“And if words don’t convince you, let the majesty and mystery of Unique’s fabulousness be enough,” Unique who was once again in a blouse, skirt, nylons and makeup added.
Several people chuckled at Unique and Sugar high-fived her.
She walked up and stood next to Marley. “I mean it. Glee club is a special place. I mean where else could I dress like this, and be welcomed with open arms?”
Marley relented.
“Okay one last thing,” Marley said. “I don’t think I’m comfortable with sitting with a cheerleader and those guys at lunch.”
“That won’t be a problem,” Kitty said walking up to them flanked by Bobby and Phil. “We could handle Gimpy and Tarantula Head-”
Artie and Joe shared a confused look.
“-and Richie Poor, because you guys were national champs like us. But, our invitation was not extended to pre-op Precious based on the novel Barf by Sapphire, and Mike and Molly’s daughter as part of our crew.”
“Well,” Blaine said, “I guess for not in your crew anymore.”
That was it. The gauntlet was down.
“You know,” she answered, “I was kind of hoping you’d say that.”
Phil and Bobby pulled slushies out from behind their backs and nailed Marley and Unique square in the face.”
Unique gasped.
Kitty, Bobby, and Phil smiled.
“And with that,” Phil said, “Order has been restored!”
Kitty turned and walked off and Phil and Bobby followed right after giving themselves a fancy hand shake.
“Well,” Artie said with a sigh, “looks like you guys have been officially welcomed to the glee club.”
“Unique’s eyes they are on fire,” Unique said.
“Let’s get you guys cleaned up and go to rehearsal,” Blaine suggested.
# # #
Kitty watched the conversation at Marley’s locker with disappointment. She has hoped that she would be able to incorporate the glee club into her social circle. She would never admit it, but she had started to like spending time with some of the glee club members, especially Artie.
Unfortunately that didn’t seem possible with their intent on embracing the freaks.
She sighed, and spoke to Bobby and Phil, “Okay, it looks like they’ve made their choice. We proceed as discussed.” She grabbed Phil’s arm, “Remember what I said before.”
He nodded. “Don’t worry I won’t touch the gimp. Just the newbies.”
“See that you don’t. We don’t need the entire school against us.”
# # #
Later that afternoon in the auditorium the new directions sang Chasing Pavement, by Adele
Marley:
I’ve made up my mind
Don’t need to think it over
If I’m wrong I am right
Don’t need to look no further
This ain’t lust
I know this is love but,
If I tell the world,
I’ll never say enough,
‘Cause it was not said to you,
And that’s exactly what I need to do,
If I end up with you
Marley with New Directions (New Directions):
Should I give up?
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere? (Nowhere)
Or would it be a waste?
Marley (with New Directions):
Even (if I knew my place?)
Should I leave it there? (New Directions: Ohhh!)
Marley with New Directions:
Should I give up?
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?
Marley (New Directions):
Even if it,
Leads nowhere (Oooo…)
Marley with New Directions harmonizing:
I’d build myself up,
And fly around in circles,
Wait then as my heart drops,
And my back begins to tingle
Finally could this be it, or,
Marley with New Directions (New Directions):
Should I give up?
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere? (Leads nowhere)
Or would it be a waste?
Marley (with New Directions):
Even (if I knew my place?)
Should I leave it there? (New Directions: Ohhh!)
Marley with New Directions:
Should I give up?
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?
Marley (New Directions):
Even if it,
Leads nowhere (Oooo…)
Yeah..
Should I give up?
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere?
Or would it be a waste? (Would it be a waste?)
Even if I knew my place? (If I knew my place?)
Should I leave it there? (Should I leave it there?)
Should I give up, (Should I…)
Or should I just (Keep on) keep on (Chasing) chasing (Pavements) pavements?
Should I just (Keep on, chasing) chasing (Pavements) pavements?
Oh! Oh-oh-oh, Oh-oooooh!
New Directions (Marley):
Should I give up,
Or should I just keep chasing pavements, (Pavements!)
Even if it leads nowhere? (Even if I, oh!)
Marley with New Directions:
Or would it be a waste,
If I knew my place?
Marley (New Directions):
Should I leave it there? (Ohhh)
New Directions (Marley):
Should I give up, (Should I?)
Or should (Keep on) I just keep,
Marley with New Directions:
Chasing pavements?
Marley (New Directions):
Even if it
Leads nowhere (Oooo…)
Initially Marley had been reluctant to join the group, standing off in the wings. But Blaine grabbed her by the arm and pulled her into the group’s formation.
Kitty was watching this from the shadows, and glanced over to see the school’s new half black half Jewish rebel-without-a-clue watching them from the aisle near the back, with great interest. There was something about that club, and Kitty would need to find another way to figure out what the deal with them was.
She glanced down at that phone in her hand and re-read the simple text message displayed on three screen:
I’m very disappointed in you. -Artie
She closed her eyes and felt ashamed.
# # #
Author’s notes: yes those of you who pay close attention will notice that some of the stuff here has been places out of sequence from the order it was In the aired episode. This was done deliberately because it makes the story flow better and make more sense. This is especially true of the JBI scenes (how could they have been seen eating lunch with Cheerios Monday morning the first day of school?)
Also, while the music is an important part of Glee, you will see lyrics included in the stories only when they seem to make the most sense with the plot. If I included them for every song they sang, the stories would end up unimaginably large. Songs sung by people in both Lima and New York (eg New York State Of Mind) are written here as if only the Lima people are singing it because the stories take place exclusively around the Lima group: specifically Kitty and Artie. In some cases I’ve transcribed the lyrics myself, but in most cases, I got them from the Glee wiki on glee.wikia.com (ffdn does not allow actual links). -WA